500 Point Annihilation Mission
Slay Them All, Let Them Come
Five Hundred Points Of Fury
On the evening of Friday, June 15, 2012 I managed to squeeze in one last 5th edition game with my Dark Eldar before the arrival of 6th edition. My force consisted of 10 Kabalites (including Splinter Cannon and Sybarite with Agonizer), 11 Wyches (inculding Hekatrix with Agonizer and Phantasm Grenade Launcher), and a Talos (with Chain flails and extra close combat weapon) being commanded by a Haemonculus with Venom Blade, Stinger Pistol, and Webway Portal. The combat drug roll for my Wyches yielded Splintermind, which means a Pain Token right out of the gate! My opponent Frank fielded an obscene amount of Slugga Boyz and Shoota Boyz backed up with Lootas and a Killa Kan which was commanded by a Mek boy with ‘eavy Armour and a Kustom Blasta. My army was outnumbered by at least two to one.
I helped Justin and Frank make this table back in 2005. It’s spent several years in Frank’s basement before being bequeathed to me. We threw down some available terrain and played the first 40K game at Casa De Cthulhu. I suppose in another six or seven years, the table will come full circle and be returned to Justin.
My ladies in red made a run for Frank’s line of greenskins. Sadly, I made poor Run rolls and spent most of the game having my pretty little Wyches getting shot to pieces by Sluggas, Big Shootas, and Lootas. On the other side of the table, my Kabalites and my Haemonculus were trying to flank.
Talos! Crush, Kill, Destroy (Repeat)!
The Kabalites really didn’t have the range to reach the Greenskins, so I popped down the Webway Portal. Thankfully, it counts as impassible terrain and gave me some cover saves while my Kabalites started inching towards the Slugga Boys that were blasting what was left of my Wyches. When the Talos came out of the portal, Orks started dying in droves. It was beautiful.
Heroism or Insanity? You decide!
Only my Hekatrix managed to survive enough to get into close combat. I directed all her attacks at the Mek Boy hoping to break even on Kill points. Sadly, she whiffed all four of her dice and then was sheared in half by the Killa Kan. She might have fared better if her sisters weren’t blown to pieces en route to the actual melee.
Now things get really interesting…
My Kabalites managed to charge the Slugga Boyz from the front while the Talos attacked them from the rear. The Sybarite failed to hit anything with her Agonizer but her Kabalites managed to take out a few Orks. The Haemonculus easily slaughtered the Mek Boy with her Venom Blade. And in the meantime, the Talos was just shredding through greenskins into chunky pieces. The Orks managed to keep from fleeing and the Kan jumped into the assault in the next round. The Talos destroyed the scratchbuilt Ork construct with a single swing while Boyz were dropping left and right.
Ozzy Ozbird surveys the carnage (and chews on a bottle cap)
With the Kan destroyed and the remaining Boyz running for the table edge, victory was practically mine. I failed to run the Orks down and had to chase them off the table edge. The only Orks left on the table were the untouched Lootas on the high ground of Frank’ deployment zone. They vaporized the remaining three Kabalites, leaving my Talos and my Haemonculus sitting ducks. Knowing I would get killed before I could ever hope to reach the Lootas, I made a desperate run behind cover. It was round five by this point, so I just hid until Frank rolled for the game to end after the closing of round seven.
Final Outcome: Victory For The Jade Dragon Kabal
In the end, I got four Kill Points (Slugga Boyz, Shoota Boyz, Killa Kan, and Mek Boy)and Frank only got two (my Kabalites and Wyches). I know hiding behind terrain from Lootas to wait out the last two rounds was cheap, but it was within the Dark Eldar ethos. Why put yourself in a position you know is heavy stacked in your enemy’s favor? It was a fun game with a come-from-behind victory that surprised even me. Hopefully next time I play, my Wyches will do more than be sacrificial lambs (again!)
The MVP of the Dark Eldar side. They never would have won without it.